Tech Eye: Blind to our charms

However, we do try, to the best of our wretched ability, to keep up with the latest in ladies' fashion, so that in the event of us being trapped at the bar beside a lovely during a society event, for example, TechEye won't find itself short of conversation and will be able to hold forth on the various new collections that are currently the toast of Yerevan Fashion Week.

It was while doing research on just this topic, research meaning crouching in the bushes and having a good leer near the local discotheque where all the young things go to, we're told, 'get their groove on', that TechEye made an astounding discovery that has slipped past us these past few weeks, thanks to a self-induced semi-conscious haze brought on by excessive gin consumption. Namely, bionic eyes that, judging by the local disco-dancing ladies, gives them x-ray vision or some such. Indeed, such is the extent of their ocular ability that our village beauties must wear sunglasses in the disco, which they perch jauntily on their heads when they step outside for a quick cigarette or 10. What other reason could there be for needing sunglasses on your head at two in the morning?

So immediately down to the village swine-merchant/optician went we and promptly bought these, convinced we were on the track. Imagine our disappointment to find no x-ray vision, which would come in very handy for the nocturnal bush-residing research. Instead we got Oakley's Thump 2, which combines a pair of sunglasses with an MP3 player with capacities from 256MB to 1GB. They're not cheap - you'll need between zł.1,150 for the entry level and zł.1,720 for the 1GB pair to wrap around your head, and you won't have x-ray vision. On the other hand, you may be more attractive to the ladies, as the Thumps will amply hide your red-rimmed wild-eyed lusty leer. And, let's face it, is there anything more important in life than that?