Tech Eye: Sharp beats

First he would grease us in fat before releasing us into a muddy pit while 12 of his closest friends would look on. Then a pack of voracious dogs would be added to the mix, and the fun would begin. Ever the kindly old gent, he always made sure we had our trusty knife in hand before the ravenous animals were released, so that it was always good, clean, harmless fun.

Once his little ring of fire had been shut down, however, he was forced to look elsewhere for entertainment, which is when Busty St Clair's Adult Emporium really began its golden years. We had to wait outside while he had his 'private relaxation treatments' of an evening, but luckily we always had our knife to hand to stop the locals getting curious.

Now, thanks to this piece of hardware, we can relive those golden years to the full, and remember what it felt like to fight for your very life with the howls of dogs and Flight of the Valkyries (Grandfather's favorite) in your ears, or recall standing in the freezing cold while Grandfather's voice would come sailing through the wind singing along to Let's Get It On. This is the Swiss Bit S.Beat MP3 from Victorinox, the very same people who make the Swiss Army Knife (personally, TechEye thinks the Swiss army needs more than a pile of knives to defend itself with, but we hear their bunkers are great). It's got an MP3 player, a knife and some scissors and if you shell out with zł.600, you should be prepared in the event of any music/arts and crafts related emergencies. Trying to take it on to a plane without detaching the MP3 player could prove a bit tricky though.

LM