Tech Eye: The mundane and the madness
For every brand new MP3 player with a built-in ugliness combater that gets shoved through the letterbox, there is a new hair-removal cream that demands a test run. For each plasma screen TV that gets mounted in our bedroom (careful now) there is a new industrial-strength cleaner that needs to be put through its paces on Uncle TechEye's less-traveled regions. And for each new anti-personnel mine that finds its way into our hands via the local football-stadium market and certain Eastern connections, there is a new pepper spray that must be given a go on our own rheumy eyeballs to see if it lives up to its "20-percent extra pain" guarantee.
Not that we are complaining - TechEye prefers to keep its whining for the back-room of the village bar for a 3am whiskey-fueled vignette of bitterness, jealousy and hatred of our fellow workers. Were we to speak our mind in work The Man would come down on us quicker than a ton of Andy Garcia-shaped bricks and we would find ourselves out on our ear with not a red cent to pay the bookie, the barman, the anger-management specialist or the bribes to the fuzz that mean our little incidents of a Saturday evening get a blind eye turned to them and our parole conditions remain unsullied.
But we digress - the point is that sometimes the mediocrity of everyday life forces its way into our tech-bedecked hovel and we are forced to look at something that fulfills a, dare we say it, 'useful' purpose.This is LG Electronic's GRD-267DTU. On the one hand it's a spanky fridge freezer with titanium finish and a chilled water and ice dispenser. On the other hand, it's got a built-in tilting, pull-out 15.1-inch touch-screen, stereo speakers, camera and microphone, which means you can watch TV, listen to music or surf the internet. It also has a self-diagnostic system for highlighting faults, something which, if TechEye had it, would save ourselves and social services a small fortune in psychologists, electro-shock therapy and police man-hours. It might cost you roughly zł.44,000, but how many times have you seen a fridge that you actually want, eh?
